Traumatic experiences in childhood tend to increase the chance of developing harmful addictions later in life. These early experiences determine our personal view of self, our self-image and worth, therefore, are the seeds of addictions. Here is what I hold to be true regarding addictions; " If people think highly of themselves, have their basic psychological needs met and enjoys life, they will not turn to unhealthy addictions. When parents have harmful addictions, they will likely pass on to their children a bumper crop of issues which makes them susceptible to destructive addictions of their own."
If during development, individuals are reinforced with the idea they are brilliant, beautiful, and important, their brain becomes hard- wired to think well of themselves and will most likely make healthy choices during their lifetime. Choices which keep them safe, happy, and content.
On the other hand , if individuals feel ignored, criticized, abandoned, isolated, unsupported, unwanted, unloved, unprotected, or if they are abused and beaten, or hungry and cold, the brain becomes wired in a totally different way and the individual will likely engage in self destructive habits to escape unwanted feelings of poor self-worth.
Addictions, or habits, are formed when we repeat a behavior over and over. Whether it's taking a drug or watching a sporting event, if it makes us feel good our brains release dopamine. We like the feeling dopamine gives us and we will want to repeat the behavior again and again.
Each time the behavior is repeated, the nerve pathways in the brain, for that particular behavior, becomes stronger, more heavily entrenched, until it becomes "set" as if in concrete.
A person is able to choose whether they will repeat the behavior for awhile, but after many repetitions there will come a point when the "setting" in the brain becomes fixed and the person is no longer at choice. They become hard-wired for this behavior and must have what they desire or they will experience terrible physical and psychological pain. Destructive addiction is born.
As infants, we arrive in this world with a brain stem that is hardwired to tell us to breathe, sleep, eat and so on. We do not have any choice in these matters. The brain stem's control or programming will override our desire to hold our breath, for example, and we will eventually breathe.
The brain stem's programming is the reason people drown. They are underwater, holding their breath, they know they should not breathe, but there will come a point when they will breathe and water will enter their lungs and they will die. They have no choice!
This is how an addiction can take over some one's life. Repeat a behavior often enough, like drinking too much, and the behavior will become part of the brain's hard-wiring. The addict wants to stop but cannot. The user does not know at what point the hard-wiring will occur but it will occur eventually and it requires a great deal of work to undue the addiction pathway. However, it can be done and many people have been successful at overcoming horrendous addictions.
Addicts tend to have multiple addictions and need help, from outside themselves, in order to really overcome their destructive behaviors.
The most common types of addictions are:
Alcohol
Illicit drugs
Sex
Work/Achievements
Food
Gambling
Prescription Drugs
Religion
Shopping
Money
Approval
Relationships
Depression
Sports
Smoking
Learning
Exercise
TV shows
Illness
These behaviors allow us to escape ourselves, our thoughts, judgments, feelings, circumstances, and other people. We become unconscious of psychological or physical pain. The behaviors become destructive when we habitually repeat them to the detriment of ourselves and others.
The best defense against seeds of addiction? Cultivate a health self- worth!
To assess your feelings of self-worth give a yes or no answer to the following seven questions. If you answer no to the majority of the questions you may have the seeds of addiction planted in your psyche and are at risk for developing harmful addictions. If you already have serious addictions seek professional help as soon as possible. .
1. I feel connected to friends and my family of origin by love,
support and trust.
2. I form long term, healthy relationships with appropriate people.
3. I am proud of my achievements, work, talents, skills or
accomplishments.
4. When assessing people I know or just meeting someone,
I primarily see their beauty and value rather than their
frailties, limitations, or ugly parts. (our judgement of others is
often how we judge ourselves)
5 I express my ideas and opinions easily and honestly.
6. I trust myself to make choices that are right for me.
7. I have values and believes that allow me to feel connected to something greater than myself and I feel better about myself for it.
Many of us have seeds of addiction but we do not have to fertilize and cultivate them. We can cultivate healthy self worth and find greater enjoyment in our lives. Seek professional advice if you know you need help in this area.
The first step in overcoming an addiction is to
As infants, we arrive in this world with a brain stem that is hardwired to tell us to breathe, sleep, eat and so on. We do not have any choice in these matters. The brain stem's control or programming will override our desire to hold our breath, for example, and we will eventually breathe. The brain stem's programming is the reason people drown. They are underwater, holding their breath, they know they should not breathe, but there will come a point when they will breathe and water will enter their lungs and they will die. They have no choice!
This is how an addiction can take over some one's life. Repeat a behavior often enough, like drinking too much, and the behavior will become part of the brain's hard-wiring. The addict wants to stop but cannot. The user does not know at what point the hard-wiring will occur but it will occur eventually and it requires a great deal of work to undue the addiction pathway. However, it can be done and many people have been successful at overcoming horrendous addictions.
Addicts tend to have multiple addictions and need help, from outside themselves, in order to really overcome their destructive behaviors.
The most common types of addictions are:
Alcohol
Illicit drugs
Sex
Work/Achievements
Food
Gambling
Prescription Drugs
Religion
Shopping
Money
Approval
Relationships
Depression
Sports
Smoking
Learning
Exercise
TV shows
Illness
These behaviors allow us to escape ourselves, our thoughts, judgments, feelings, circumstances, and other people. We become unconscious of psychological or physical pain. The behaviors become destructive when we habitually repeat them to the detriment of ourselves and others.
The best defense against seeds of addiction? Cultivate a health self- worth!
To assess your feelings of self-worth give a yes or no answer to the following seven questions. If you answer no to the majority of the questions you may have the seeds of addiction planted in your psyche and are at risk for developing harmful addictions. If you already have serious addictions seek professional help as soon as possible. .
1. I feel connected to friends and my family of origin by love,
support and trust.
2. I form long term, healthy relationships with appropriate people.
3. I am proud of my achievements, work, talents, skills or
accomplishments.
4. When assessing people I know or just meeting someone,
I primarily see their beauty and value rather than their
frailties, limitations, or ugly parts. (our judgement of others is
often how we judge ourselves)
5 I express my ideas and opinions easily and honestly.
6. I trust myself to make choices that are right for me.
7. I have values and believes that allow me to feel connected to something greater than myself and I feel better about myself for it.
Many of us have seeds of addiction but we do not have to fertilize and cultivate them. We can cultivate healthy self worth and find greater enjoyment in our lives. Seek professional advice if you know you need help in this area.
The first step in overcoming an addiction is to
acknowledge their is a problem and ask for help.
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